HG is a tough teacher
Posted: Mar 01, 2007 12:47 amI am the mother of three beautiful girls. They are here blessing the earth only because I am a Hyperemesis Gravidarum survivor.
I claim that title with honor because the personal battle my body raged against itself nearly killed me and threatened the lives of my daughters. My family fought the battle alongside me. They lived in fear that I would not survive. Hyperemesis destroyed my health, tested the strength of my marriage, took an emotional toll on my family and left us in financial ruin. I am proud to count myself among the women who have waged this war.
HG has taught me many lessons.
I have learned that some people think it takes a village to raise a child but the reality is that I required the help of a village simply to get my baby here.
I have learned that sometimes it is necessary to swallow my pride and allow others to help me with tasks as basic as bathing and changing my clothing.
I have learned that the terrible smell coming from me wasn’t just from my inability to care for myself but rather it was the hideous smell of my body feeding on itself.
I have learned that some of the fluid that enters your body through an IV will still end up in your stomach. The volume of this fluid will generally exceed the capacity of a hospital emesis basin.
I have learned that doctors and nurses are often ignorant of the true status of their patients. They sometimes make decisions based on their own personal agendas rather than on the needs of their patients.
I have learned that a good doctor might not know everything but he does make sure he learns everything he can to help his patient. A great doctor saves lives one patient at a time and does it through listening and offering encouragement as well as through medical treatment.
I have learned that people I considered friends disappeared during tough times but they were replaced by people who brought food for my family, helped my children and offered their care and concern despite not knowing me well.
I have learned that insurance companies are more concerned about their bottom line than my well-being. I have also learned that Aetna’s refusal to continue to pay for my Zofran at thirty-four weeks was cruel and unusual punishment for needing an expensive medication designed for chemo patients. I learned to appreciate the irony in the fact that their attempt to save on the cost of my medication resulted in more expenses for them due to added complications and a necessary early induction.
I have learned that people stare at grocery shoppers who are attached to IV bags they carry around in a backpack.
I have learned to respond to well-intentioned people who insist that medications are harmful to an unborn child by explaining that without them neither myself nor my baby would be alive. The potential risks of medication wins over the certainty of dealth.
I have learned that my most basic beliefs can be tested in ways I never would have imagined.
I have learned that I have found sisters among fellow HG survivors. They have taught me more about caring, struggles, meds and loss than I could have imagined. I have learned that people who survive a war together have a common bond that surpasses distinctions of race, economic position and lifestyle.
Most importantly HG has taught me that a woman strong enough to survive HG is capable of anything.
HG has changed my life. It is not something I would willing choose but I would not trade what I have learned.
The only way HG will become less of a threat is through education. Healthcare professionals and women need to be made aware that HG exists and that treatment is available.
I will continue to support women suffering through HG while I strive to educate anyone who will listen about HG. I am working to save women and their babies one person at a time.
Donna Tobin
I claim that title with honor because the personal battle my body raged against itself nearly killed me and threatened the lives of my daughters. My family fought the battle alongside me. They lived in fear that I would not survive. Hyperemesis destroyed my health, tested the strength of my marriage, took an emotional toll on my family and left us in financial ruin. I am proud to count myself among the women who have waged this war.
HG has taught me many lessons.
I have learned that some people think it takes a village to raise a child but the reality is that I required the help of a village simply to get my baby here.
I have learned that sometimes it is necessary to swallow my pride and allow others to help me with tasks as basic as bathing and changing my clothing.
I have learned that the terrible smell coming from me wasn’t just from my inability to care for myself but rather it was the hideous smell of my body feeding on itself.
I have learned that some of the fluid that enters your body through an IV will still end up in your stomach. The volume of this fluid will generally exceed the capacity of a hospital emesis basin.
I have learned that doctors and nurses are often ignorant of the true status of their patients. They sometimes make decisions based on their own personal agendas rather than on the needs of their patients.
I have learned that a good doctor might not know everything but he does make sure he learns everything he can to help his patient. A great doctor saves lives one patient at a time and does it through listening and offering encouragement as well as through medical treatment.
I have learned that people I considered friends disappeared during tough times but they were replaced by people who brought food for my family, helped my children and offered their care and concern despite not knowing me well.
I have learned that insurance companies are more concerned about their bottom line than my well-being. I have also learned that Aetna’s refusal to continue to pay for my Zofran at thirty-four weeks was cruel and unusual punishment for needing an expensive medication designed for chemo patients. I learned to appreciate the irony in the fact that their attempt to save on the cost of my medication resulted in more expenses for them due to added complications and a necessary early induction.
I have learned that people stare at grocery shoppers who are attached to IV bags they carry around in a backpack.
I have learned to respond to well-intentioned people who insist that medications are harmful to an unborn child by explaining that without them neither myself nor my baby would be alive. The potential risks of medication wins over the certainty of dealth.
I have learned that my most basic beliefs can be tested in ways I never would have imagined.
I have learned that I have found sisters among fellow HG survivors. They have taught me more about caring, struggles, meds and loss than I could have imagined. I have learned that people who survive a war together have a common bond that surpasses distinctions of race, economic position and lifestyle.
Most importantly HG has taught me that a woman strong enough to survive HG is capable of anything.
HG has changed my life. It is not something I would willing choose but I would not trade what I have learned.
The only way HG will become less of a threat is through education. Healthcare professionals and women need to be made aware that HG exists and that treatment is available.
I will continue to support women suffering through HG while I strive to educate anyone who will listen about HG. I am working to save women and their babies one person at a time.
Donna Tobin
I wish everyone in America could your letter. Thank you for giving HG a voice!