Hi everyone!
I thought I would start this topic so that men can come and see a list of things that might have worked for us to help us through this tough time with HG. We understand that men have a need to provide, protect and fix everything. It is understandable that it is frustraiting for you and very painful and confusing at times to not know what to do and how to make everything better. Your wife/partner might be lying on the bed/couch/floor whatever moaning, crying, screaming or just puking and barely breathing and at that moment... what do you do?
Well, I hope that this topic will help you with some of that. I will start off with some of the things that Bradley, my husband did for me that helped ease the suffering, even though sometimes only a little.
1. He would rub and squeeze my feet. We have a lot of pressure points in our feet (I use to be a massage therapist) and if you hit the right spots it can ease nausea and if nothing else it might distract her for short moments that she might not otherwise have.
2. He would read stories to me. Yes, cheesy and childish sounding, but it is another distraction. Also, in an odd sort of way it will bond you two together in a more comforting/nurturing and protecting way as we bonded with our mothers as babies.
3. He would lightly rub my head. This would sooth me, though not if I was having an exceptionally bad day.
4. Make sure she has plenty of ice near by if she can't keep down water.
5. Make sure she has access to a tv and or computer - distraction is the key!
6. If you have to leave her, don't be gone longer then you have to be and always be near a phone so she can reach you, even if just to moan in your ear.
7. Always listen. If she just needs to cry, let her. If she needs to scream, let her. If she needs to be held, hold her. Just be there in support. Let her know that though you may not understand how she 'feels', you are there to do whatever it takes to help.
Well, this is all I can think of right now. I hope this helps. Also, I will look forward to anything that others might have to say on this topic as well. If I think of anything more I will post it. Just remember, you too are not alone. For other woman out there that are suffering with HG, there are men who along side them suffer too in their own way. Knowledge is the key. With a lack of knowledge there is fear, but with knowledge and support then you have a tool you can use. I hope this helps!
Sincerely,
Alison