Special Needs

Share your questions about and experiences with adoption or surrogacy pregnancy alternatives.

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Postby dwtegli » Feb 17, 2007 8:35 pm

I wish I had some advice, but I don't know anything about it. I just wanted to give you some kudos for even considering special needs adoption. I had planned on doing something similar when I though I was unable to have kids. I would still like to do it someday when my kids are a bit older.

Good luck to you.
There's no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one. ~ Jill Churchill
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Postby aaronsmommy » Feb 17, 2007 8:47 pm

That is great that he is developing normally. I know there are a few moms here who had babies with IUGR. Teddi's twins did, and a few others. If you ask in Life or postpartum about IUGR, I'm sure you'll get several stories.

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Postby mrsbigdog » Feb 19, 2007 10:19 pm

Sending very good vibes your way. :D

Good luck and keep us updated.

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Postby *my3sons* » Feb 20, 2007 11:03 pm

Well, I have very limited knowlege of IUGR even though my son had it. I believe that effects of IUGR probably vary widely and you will find many different outcomes. Hopefully, you will find many cases to have a look at to familiarize yourself with possible hurdles.

When they turned my son from breech position about 6 weeks before he was due the u/s showed that his placenta appeared completely depleted and they suspected he was no longer getting anything from it. They watched him closely through multiple u/s and non-stress tests and according to the radiologist he did not grow at all for the next 4 weeks. They decided 2 weeks before he was due, directly following an u/s, that they had to get him out right away. Which they did. My doctor was hoping he would be at least 4 lbs. His approximate weight was a hard guess because for my whole pregnancy I measured weeks behind where I should have been and had a very tiny belly. Well, guess what, we where blessed with a 5lb 15 oz little boy. They classified him as a preemie for some reason, even though he exceeded those weight guidelines and did not require any special medical intervention. Although, the pediatrician that came to examine him before our release made stupid wistful comments like, "He'll never play the violin" as he looked at his fingers, my son quickly rose to the 75th percentile for length. He got to that point by 6 mos. He has just turned 14 and is 6ft. 2in., the tallest kid in his youth group and taller than a lot of the dads at church. He is rail thin though but he gets that from my side of the family. Listed below are the only negative things I've noticed that may or may not be related to the IUGR.

1. Never ever latched on for BF. He had absolutely no sucking reflex and for several months could not even grip the bottle in his mouth well. Much of the formula just ran down his chin. Not like you normally see. I mean we had to fold up a cloth diaper and put it under his chin while he ate and it was totally soaked by the time he was done. He did grow out of that though. (This one does sound like hallmark IUGR to me.)

2. He was sickly for the first 2 years. Nothing serious but he caught every virus that came anywhere near him. My other 2 sons did not seem to be as susceptible as infants.

3. He has had a patch of grey hair about the size of a dime on the side of his head since about 7 yrs old and has some grey around the crown of his head. (Who the heck knows what that is about.)

4. He did hit puberty early and developed man like muscle tone and hair at around 11-12 years of age. (The doctor was not concerned about this either.)

He has had no learning difficulties at all.

The only other child I have known personally that had IUGR was full-term and had a lower birthweight than my son. He was just a tiny bit over 4 lbs. He is very thin like my son as well but not tall like my son. He does not have learning issues that I am aware of but has had issues with making friends and kind of being an outcast. Like I said, he is still very thin and frail looking. His facial features are a little elfish looking (for lack of a better way to describe him) but I think he looks like his father so he'd probably look like that even without the IUGR. He was also born with that esophageal blockage reflux issue and required surgery a few weeks after birth. Last I heard, he has become interested in performing in his high school's plays and is talented at the guitar. I do not think he will have any lasting issues.

Best Wishes!
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