The visit that changed my life...

Share an uplifting story from your pregnancy or triumph over HG to help others find a way to laugh & remain hopeful. Post your children's updates, brag pics, and milestones.

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The visit that changed my life...

Postby MamaLily » Aug 01, 2004 10:28 pm

Hi everyone!

I've wanted to write about this for so long but have put it off. Today I promised myself to just sit down and write it out...

When I was in the middle of HG suffering, a woman named Kathy came to see me. She had been through HG 5 times herself and had 2 children. Her HG was so severe! And yet she is really the most positive woman I have ever met. She is a friend of my parents, and when she heard that I had HG, she came over the next day to talk with me.

Her perspective on HG was so amazing. She talked about how grateful she is for the lessons that she learned from suffering so greatly. Her words will never leave me. She said, "Most women only get a baby out of pregnancy. We get so much more!" Kathy feels that HG gave her a new outlook on life - and that outlook makes her very grateful for so many things. I remember her words about how she appreciates the small things in life: "Colors are brighter, nature is more beautiful, life is more precious" after surviving HG. She said that she has more compassion for people who suffer from cancer or other diseases. She knows what it is to go through the most horrible suffering - and to survive it with grace.

At the time, I was connected to a feeding tube and taking more meds than I can recall, so her words didn't fully sink in. But over the years, I have come to appreciate them as truth. Although I wouldn't have signed up for HG in a million years, I am now more grateful for HG than I am for almost anything else in life. The lessons I learned from HG are powerful ones, and I am thankful everyday for what I learned. Colors really are brighter, the sky is more beautiful, sunsets are worth watching, etc. I agree with Kathy that HG suffering helps me to be compassionate toward others who suffer - not only from HG but from other diseases/conditions. HG makes me so grateful to have a beautiful, healthy, bright, funny daughter that I am around to enjoy everyday. HG helped me realize that there are so many little things to be grateful for - brushing my teeth without gagging, taking a shower by myself, eating a meal without being ready to see it again, driving a car, taking a walk, etc. HG taught me to rely completely on other people, which was very difficult for me. It helped me understand how much my mom loves me, for I am an HG baby myself. And HG taught me more about God's love for me than any other experience in my life. I could not have made it without Him.

I realize that HG is not something any of us would ever seek, but Kathy helped me see that it is not a completely negative experience. The suffering is more horrible than I care to remember, and yet the lessons I learned from my experiences help me every day. Kathy's visit changed me and changed my life. It helped me to be thankful for the hardest time in my life, and it helped me to take that horrible time and use it for good.

Because of this remarkable woman's words and perspective, I feel that my HG story is a story of realized hopes.

My thoughts are always with all of you...

- Anna
"The little reed, bending to the force of the wind, soon stood upright again when the storm had passed over." - Aesop
MamaLily
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Postby emily » Aug 02, 2004 10:38 am

Anna,

I agree 100%.

Because of HG:

I have a stronger relationship with my husband

I am more understanding and compassionate toward others

I have an appreciation and understanding for people who are elderly and or aging

I have a greater appreciation for those with an illness

I have a greater appreciation for those with a disability

I was able to take new mommyhood very well and cope with any challenges because I had just made it through HG and I felt very empowered

I fit into my pre-pregnancy jeans in a week

I am a much more laid back person

I am not as argumentative as I was before HG

I don't let the small things get to me

I take my health more seriously (I was 23 when I had HG and still in the "I am young and invincible" mindset)

I appreciated the time with my baby so greatly, because I honestly felt she would be my only child, and that made for an amazing experience with my baby


Anyhow, there are other things as well. I just can't think of them at the moment. Not that HG is a "good" experience to have but AFTER the HG, I did walk away a better, stronger, nicer person.

Emily
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Postby carriedodson » Aug 02, 2004 9:31 pm

What a wonderful post. Thanks for taking the time to write it. I agree that no woman who has HG takes feeling good for granted ever again. I'll never forget the meal I ate in the hospital after Katie was born. I was soo happy to be able to eat it all and drink at the same time. God bless you!
Carrie
Mommy of "Noodle" (5-19-03)
#2 edd 3-15-05
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Postby RebeccaM » Aug 03, 2004 10:54 am

Anna and Emily,

Thank you so much for your uplifting posts, and for sharing something so personal.
Rebecca
-----------
Mom to:
Tierra Ashlee 9/15/03
Eli Spencer 7/16/05
Haylee Belle 3/4/09
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Postby Gail » Aug 03, 2004 9:58 pm

It is strange how something as bad as hg can give you a whole new outlook on life. I had always thought of myself as a compassionate individual. I have been a nurse on the oncology floor at my hospital for 8 yrs now. But 5yrs ago I got a whole new perspective on things when I became the patient. I can remember lying in my bed wanting to die and then I would think how my patients must have been feeling. The differance was, that I knew I would eventually get better. I do believe in my heart that it has made me a better nurse. I will never forget the lessons that hg has taught me.
Mom to two girls
Sydney (6-7-95)
Lauren (10-13-99)
Lost Angel (2-9-04)

Strange how people who suffer together have stronger connections than people who are most content---Bob Dylan
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Postby Mar2 » Aug 05, 2004 1:42 pm

Anna - Thank you for sharing such a beautiful story. A special person helped me to think about miscarriage and HG in a similar way and I will always be grateful. HG moms seem to appreciate their children in a way some other moms might not...and that is something I wouldn't trade for all the non-HG pregnancies in the world.
Marla
------------------------------------------------
HG PG 1: miscarried at 16 weeks 3/18/2002
HG PG 2: baby girl 5/29/2003
Step-Son: born 11/26/1990 (acquired May 1997)
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Postby stephensmam » Aug 06, 2004 5:16 pm

i agree also , while i was in the hosp at the start of this pg i looked out at the beautifyl blue sky and decided that as soon as i was wwell i would never take anything for granted again i would enjoy each day , being able to drive eat ect im determined to have a life when this baby is born im going to grab life and enjoy it , ihg has also given me a hugh amount of sympathy for other people , and with out it i would never have met such wonderful people through the internet so i am blessed , ill be even more positive in a few weeks when this child is born but thats the best i can do at the moment lol
lots of love and hugs Jacqueline
HG pg no 1 28/04/98 darling son Stephen ivs only,pnd
HG pg no 2 01/09/04 darling daughter Sarah ivs , zofran, steroids, meclizine, b6.http://lilypie.com/Kids_Birthday_code.p ... y_code.php#
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Thank you!

Postby Becca » Aug 18, 2004 9:27 am

Anna,

I want to thank you for your very encouraging post!! Today is my first visit to this forum, and I am around 9 1/2 weeks pregnant. I felt lonely this morning (even with supportive, loving family) and didn't even realize that there was a name for what I have been experiencing. I am doing better by the grace of God, but I think I've been somewhere between morning sickness and HG. I am hoping and praying that things will continue to get better.

After reading your story, I cried because I realized that what you said was so true! My life has already been changed because of my experiences. I have more compassion for other people and appreciate the "little" things SO MUCH MORE than I did before. Things like, eating a meal and really enjoying it, not throwing up, sleeping through the night, being able to have a "normal" sense of smell, enjoying being close to my hubby instead of feeling so sick I don't want to be touched, etc., etc. etc.

I am SO ENCOURAGED to have found this site. I know that God led me to it, and I thank you for your encouraging, uplifting words at a time when I really needed them! May God bless you!

Becca
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what a beautiful message!ife lessons

Postby acorn » Aug 19, 2004 2:06 pm

dear anna,
my baby daughter, daliah, is in my arms as i type. born 7-10-04, she is my miracle baby. i had hg till the delivery. this hg was absolutely the most difficult thing i have ever gone through. and, it taught me the greatest of life lessons. i have a new perspective on life and i value every single moment with my beautiful daughter. while other new moms might complain about sleep-deprivation or having to hold their infants all day long (my baby insists on it!), i welcome the night feeds, i love the cuddling, and i relish the fact that i am her mother. i feel that my entire life has purpose, as i was meant to be born to bring my remarkable baby into the world.

you were so instrumental in helping me through my pregnancy. thank you for all you did for me, and all you do for other hg sufferers.

you are a wonderful person.!

amy
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