Putting life back together again

[emily]

This may sound weird but in a lot of ways, it feels like things have changed MORE with this baby than they did having my first. I have never really been a SAHM. DH and I have pretty much shared the at home parenting 50/50 since he has been a student for the past 4 years. But, now he is working full time again and he will be graduating in December, so my role as SAHM is really becoming much more so. I am really trying to get a feel for what the heck my life is going to be about. I suddenly really feel sucked into mommyhood, where before, I was just Emily who happened to have a baby.

[meg]

Emily,
I know what you mean. I remember feeling a bit like that when I had Patrick. I used to joke to dh that I had so much free time when it was just Anabel I should have solved world hunger or brought about world peace! Having two is a lot different than having one - at least it was for me. I can't really tell you what your life will hold, you'll decide that for yourself as you go along. Six weeks from now, it'll seem "old hat."

[teddi]

It is an adjustment after every baby I think. I still feel like... lost or something.

It's so weird to start living life again and remember that a year ago....dang, I was in the midst of HG. And time flies so fast. I feel like my girls should be 3 months old, not 6!

I feel like pressing the PAUSE button!! Like, wait let me catch my breath!

Emily, I think eventually it will pan out. And then you get a "new normal". I dunno if it's just me, but HG, the whole experience is disorienting.

[PamelaRose]

I know that going from one to two children was definitely the most difficult adjustment for our family, much worse than going from two to three. It's so much easier to juggle life when there are two big people and only one little one; once the second child comes along, you either have to split up and each take a child, which leads to isolation (closest I've been to post-partum depression came when DH kept taking Brody and leaving me with baby Avery to "help out"), or you're stuck with mounting frustration as you watch each other try to sort out parenting multiple children. Ugh. It takes some time, but it will all fall into place. The best advice I have (as a 1/4-time SAHM) is to make routines for yourself and your days. Good luck!

[danimomof2girls]

I also agree that going from one to two children was a huge adjustment. I worked full time before my first one was born, so I went through the shock of a relocation with my husband's job and a newborn all at the same time, and yes, I became a SAHM! I had a lot of depression at that point; not because I didn't want to be home with Kaitlyn, but because I was mourning a part of me that I felt I had lost. When you're a SAHM, you have to work harder to find that piece of you that makes you YOU. It isn't your job skills anymore. It's a very big shock. With having the second child, you have to juggle two people who constantly need your attention and then don't forget the biggest kid, your hubby! It is exhausting to even go to the grocery store, but if you're like me, you do it to prove to yourself that you can. Now I look at my 5 and 3 year old and wonder where did the time go? I also wish I had a pause button. I know it can be hard, but try to relish the good times and survive the bad ones. You'll fall into a routine with the second one in no time!

[emily]

I just wanted to let you all know how much I appreciate your replies. Yesterday was my first day at home alone and I wimped out and ended up meeting dh for lunch and going to my mom's house for a couple hours afterward.