by Valerie Cruz » Jul 01, 2004 2:18 pm
With my first pregnancy I thought I was losing my mind, and I probably was. I hated for people to eat in front of me, I would literally tell people off. I thought I was dying. I was never put on any meds and I was told it all go away but when it didn't I was made to feel like I was overexagerating. Now I think I was delirious because I was basically starving. Not a thing stood down but I continued to eat hoping that I wasn't vomiting everything, and I could not think of abortion, beside the fact I was raised in an apostolic church. I waited five years before I became pregnant again. I was so afraid of going through the same thing because I didn't know of HG. I was hoping that my second pregnancy would be different, because everyone says they are. Unfortunately, it wasn't much better in the beginning. This time I had different doctors, I was being seen at a clinic. The doctors there were awful, the first doctor acted like he listened to what I said but I felt like it just didn't register. Then I went back a week later for my physical and I had another doctor who I automatically didn't like. I felt uncomfortable because of the way he touched me and because of the comments he made about my vagina. I tried to tell him how I was feeling and he just ignored me and kept talking, I was furious and I wanted to tell him off but I just didn't feel up to it. I was already feeling weak. I was scheduled for another appointment in another month and I was on my way. I knew what I was going through just wasn't normal but I was made to feel like it'll pass and again like I was just overexagerating. I went back to work, in a warehouse, and over the next few weeks I was losing so much weight and everyone was asking what was wrong that I didn't look good and that I should go see a doctor. Finally, when about three weeks past, I almost past out walking back from the bathroom and one of my supervisors stopped me. She told me that I really needed to see a doctor and how to go about getting gov't assistance, because of my income. She told me what doctor to see and gave me his number. I went home early. The next day I called to make an appointment, I was seen the same day and admitted into the hospital because I had lost over 15 pounds in 3 weeks. When I came home I felt so much better. But I was so depressed because of what I was going through and because at the time my brother had been shot. He was released from the hospital two days before I was admitted. So not only was I going to work, I was trying to be a good mother and aunt, I was also trying to be there for my only brother who had nearly died and I was alone because the babies father and I had a fall out. I remember I wanted to just die. I was taken off of work and had to go on disability, but I was totally alone. After being released from the hospital my first child went to stay with her father because he knew that I was going through alot. He would check on me and send her home for awhile in the afternoon. I was put on meds and they seemed to work with most foods and I started to keep the same weight. I was monitored weekly, when I was about four months, the doctor allowed me to go back to work under alot of restrictions and I had patched up things with the dad. Then I started having contractions at work and I was taken off of work again. This time I handled it okay and I was. I would still get sick but it was tolerable and if I started having contractions I just went to the hospital and they would give me something to stop the contractions. And Here I Am five months after my second child Pregnant Again. People think I'm crazy but I love my kids and they are so worth everything, even if it brings me close to death, which I was close to with the first delivery. I'm not on meds yet but I'm off of work, I'm about three months so when I go back to the doctor I'll most likely be perscribed something. I've already lost over ten pounds, I skipped an appointment this week, I was just not feeling up to it. But now that I've read the information on this site you bet I'll be making an appointment for as soon as possible.