Help

A place where partners, fathers, friends, and family members can discuss experiences and difficulties regarding loved ones' Hyperemesis.

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Help

Postby preston » Nov 22, 2012 8:49 am

Hi I am new to this website and have a girlfriend who is 12 weeks pregnant and has been diagnosed with hypermensis. We haven't been together very long (around 5 months) and due to my lack of understanding of the condition things have probably been more difficult than they normally would be.

There has been a 5 day hospital visit due to sickness and dehydration and the mood swings which I have found very difficult to deal with. Due to my lack of understanding I have taken these mood swings personally and answering back and starting arguments, last night I reacted and it started another argument and I ended up staying away for the night which has again made the situation even worse and i'm sure made her feel worse about herself and now my girlfriend will hardly speak to me.

I have now been on this website to try and understand the condition which i know should have done before but didn't, and realise I have got this totally wrong and have basically behaved like an idiot due to my ignorence. I would love to put things right and be alot more supportive as i know I could have done alot more, but I have a very angry girlfriend who will hardly speak to me. I am wondering if there are any ideas to put try and start putting this right, I do appreciate things will take time to put right and there will be no instant quick fix.

Any other tips on coping for either of us would be excellent as there are very rarely good days for her at all

Thanks in advance
preston
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Re: Help

Postby Onlyiknow » Nov 22, 2012 10:22 pm

I can tell you what Hg feels like for me and im sure for her. Its a constant nausea feeling, like you're on a boat and cant get off. You want to desperately eat and drink but it makes the nausea worst, it never stays down and over all you feel like u have the worst stomach flu ever. Any movement makes it worse, you feel weak, your heart beats like itd going to pound out of your chest. Smells are horrible! You can smell every single thing. ppl offer all these suggestions on what can help but honestly nothing really works and if u do find something that works, you're lucky! Yoy feel really alone bc no seems to understand, its easy to get depressed. Im sure this is hard on you as well. I dont doubt that, but right now she probably feels alone and its hard to understand for her as well, sometimrs she may talk out of her head, we lose so much from our bodies and our mind as well. Sometimes we cant think straight. Communication is key, you just have to listen to eachother and be understanding. Its not easy but it can be done. She's really going to need your support. Ppl are gna say things that she doesnt like and even if u agree, just be on her side. Its a lonely road she's facing and itll help if she knew u understood. Sending blessings your way
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Re: Help

Postby ruthamelia » Nov 25, 2012 4:55 pm

First thing to put things straight (like you asked): start doing things. You repeated a few times that she isn't even talking to you- so don't force her to talk, but your actions, especially if they remain consistent, will speak volumes. Do whatever seems like it needs done so she doesn't have to. Do her laundry when she's vomited all over her clothes and sheets. Hand her a damp cloth to wipe her face after she throws up. Go through the mail so she doesn't have to. Tell her friends how much it would mean for them to call her and offer their support. Do any driving that is necessary so she doesn't have to go out. Pick up prescriptions. Make sure she gets refills when she needs them. If she ever tells you any food or drink she thinks she could keep down, go to the store and get it... right away. Clean the toilet so she isnt' staring at gunk.
You've already done two things right: looking at this website to learn about hyperemesis, and asking for help and support. Keep doing those things and I think you will both be better for it! I hope that things start improving for both of you.
daughter 2/21/11 HG wk4-birth
?? due 11/30/14
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Re: Help

Postby Mercuary » Oct 30, 2014 5:23 am

I have now been on this website to try and understand the condition which i know should have done before but didn't, and realise I have got this totally wrong and have basically behaved like an idiot due to my ignorence. I would love to put things right and be alot more supportive as i know I could have done alot more, but I have a very angry girlfriend who will hardly speak to me. I am wondering if there are any ideas to put try and start putting this right, I do appreciate things will take time to put right and there will be no instant quick fix.
Fais
Mercuary
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Posts: 1
Joined: Oct 30, 2014 5:12 am


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