HI Emma,
I am so sorry you are feeling so down and yukky right now. I totally understand what you are going thru (see below, this is my fourth HG pregnancy
) and I have had three separate HG "caretakers" with my pregnancies. One was my parents, and each of my husbands.
While I am totally TOTALLY in support of your decision, I really did just want to say one thing to you. PLease dont make any final decisions on this until at least six months postpartum. I mean, no vasectomies, no tubal ligations, nothing permanent. I am in NO way trying to discount your fears, or your feelings, but I would hate to see you make a decsion that you cant take back later. When I was pregnant with my first, I swore to God, Buddha, anyone who would listen that I would NEVER get pregnant again. I was so sure, and I actually wrote it in his baby book!! And then I lost him, and I stopped being sick, and over time, the feelings changed. KNowing the massive HG I had, I actively tried for my second, and had the same thoughts from 5 weeks til delivery, NO MORE BABIES FOR ME!!!!. I lost the baby, lost the HG, and the feelings changed. When I was 10 weeks with my third, I spoke to the OB about getting my tubes tied. I had the worse case of HG so far, I lost 30 lbs, threw up constantly for 35 weeks, spent three months of it admitted to Mother/baby, and once went into early renal failure. I had my son in Nov, and chose not to have the tubes tied. (not because of a changed mind, but because it came with a co-pay we couldnt afford at that time). After the pregnancy, my DH admitted to me that he spent days crying on his way to work, and that once, at the peak of it, he even researched terminations. He has been to war in Iraq and maintains (laughing about it now), that HG was harder!!
Two years later, my son is a toddler, and I am pregnant YET AGAIN. And we werent just trying, we actually went to fertility experts, thats how despearte we were to have another. Its quite funny now, looking back on it. I still have HG, but have learnt how to deal with it. I also can think now that the end result is worth it, and coming from someone with experience (not just pregnant friends that threw up once their entire pregnancies!!
) that it IS a short period of time to be sick, and that it is well worth what you get for it.
My Mum stopped having kids for fear of HG, and now she says it is her biggest regret. While of course you can have these feelings now, and yes, you may stick with it, and choose to have one darling child, please dont make any permament choices yet. Your mind may change yet.
BTW- I am NOW done, and my DH is getting the snippy snip snip next month.
But I am done for my reasons, not for the reasons HG dictated to me. I would put up with another 10 years of HG for one day with my children, and I know you will feel the same way. Good Luck, and I hope you feel better soon.
Nikki
HG babies 1+2: Mummys angels
HG baby 3: Bayden, 28mos
HG babies 4+ 5: Twins due July.