by Ivydragon » Apr 02, 2007 11:58 am
Wow, how exciting! We are doing exactly the same thing, sorting out the house, trying to keep busy. I know our lives will turn upside down when we add that next new child to our family, because that's precisely what happened the last time we did it. I want to be able to focus, ya know? Last time I'd gotten to the cleaning point where I was doing curtains, and they didn't go back up for 3 months! lol.
We have slow progress. I get the sense that communication between birth family members and the agency has been difficult to achieve. We have communicated enough with one Gmother through email to still be interested in this little boy, but we have to remain cautious, because in adoption there are no guarantees until you are in the court room and it's done. We've already had so many possibilities in the last year turn to nothing, and you wouldn't believe the number of friends we have who have known an unwed Mom who ended up placing their baby for adoption and they never considered us because they didn't know we exsisted. You know, we're totally ok if people don't choose us because they don't feel it's the right place for their child, but to never really be seriously considered is hard. One friend told us that they want to protect us from getting our hopes up! At that rate they'll never help us adopt. Adoption is all about hope, and connections. There are a lot of this boy's family members who care about what happens to this little guy, and I think that's really good - I'm secretly hoping that it would mean a good open adoption, but we're just going to have to wait and see if everyone else agrees. I think this little guy would be an excellent addition to the family, we'd be very excited to have him, and then we'd be done - and I could settle into just raising my kids, instead of wondering where in the world my 3rd boy is. I started trying to figure out how we were gonna get our 3rd boy in April of 2001 - been nearly 6 years, when I looked into getting pg again (found the HuGS forum), and did and miscarried in 2003, and then was so traumatized adoption was the only option left. It's a long time to wonder, and it's been a hard road.
Huge hugs, and I'm thinking of you! I know exactly how nerve wracking that is to know that a committee is meeting to decide who gets the baby, and you have a 50/50 shot - that's how we got Adam. What a roller coaster! Cleaning my house was the only thing that kept me sane. I'm planning out our dream backyard in between cleaning the house, and it's spring break, so we're doing extra fun stuff this week - movies, cookies, pudding finger painting, play dates, etc. Oh, and surprise, surprise, Adam hasn't been a monster all week! Just here and there, which I can totally handle.
Andy
Mom to Aaron 14 (HG), Anna 11 (HG), Adam 8 (adopted), Andrew 8 (adopted), fostering a newborn . . .