When I got pregnant, it was after YEARS of being told I could NEVER have children. When the test read positive, I remember stopping and praying and saying, "Lord, I will go through ANYTHING if you just let me keep my baby." I was originally pregnant with twins. I lost one and was in danger of losing the other. I had no idea what I was asking for because, boy did he lay it on me! I had severe HG from about 3 weeks til about a month after birth! I couldn't even stand to eat or drink anything until she was about 3 weeks old!
All throughout my pregnancy, I had a "friend" who was constantly telling me to be happy. "It's a blessing." "A lot of women can't even get pregnant in order to FEEL a little morning sickness." "If you can't accept your blessing, maybe you won't get to keep it!" She used to think I was complaining as well because I would excuse myself from our group (we were co-workers and a bunch of us would eat lunch and go out to dinner after work together) to go to the bathroom. I don't remember saying, "Whoa is me!" I just said "Excuse me" and left.
I remember being jealous when I used to see pregnant women or hear some child call out, "Mommy." I remember wanting that so badly that when my cousin would tell me about her HG, I would silently think to myself, "It sounds rough, but I'll take it!" I do not, however, remember being insensitive! To tell a woman with HG who has already lost a child that their other child may not survive (which is unfortunately a very real possibility in our case) is just WRONG. I actually cried with my cousin when she had to terminate her pregnancy because she couldn't go through with the HG anymore. I had not yet experienced it, but I knew it had to be something devastating for a women to get rid of her child. I never blamed her or told her she was being weak. Even after I had the HG experience of my own (and am currently going through it again, no children indeed!), I can still understand why she did what she did and support her choice.
The worst part about HG, for me, isn't even the things I have to go through. It's going through all of this without anyone who understands you or believes it's real. To me, it's like telling a person going through chemo and radiation, "I have no sympathy for your complaints when you're still alive. Other people with cancer are already dead!"