Hyperemesis Gravidarum Support and Research Forums

by **HelenA** » Jul 12, 2005 7:37 am

Ok, lets set the scene. I take KimberlyAnn to the weigh in clinic this morning... There is a row of tables with changing mats on, you hand your baby book in at the desk on the way in, and then strip your baby down to it's nappy until the health visitor calls you over to weigh baby. I'm in the middle of taking her clothes off when the woman next to me says "awww isn't she cute, how old is she?" I tell her she's just over 6 weeks and she mentions how big she is for 6 weeks, Then I say "You wouldn't think it seeing as I couldn't eat for most of the pg, as I was so sick" She then says "Oh...You had morning sickness all the way thru huh?" I tell her no, it was HG, and give a brief description of what it is. She then says "did you try.....?" And rattles of a list of the usual m/s cures. I tell her nope, nothing worked at all. Then she says "Well there must be a reason why you were so sick, m/s usually goes away after 12 weeks" I tell her again... It's not m/s, it's HG. She then says "Well what causes it?" I say that there's no known cause. Her reply: "well there must be a reason why you got it" Yes...you must be right, maybe I done something really horrible in a past life, and this is my punishment. But instead I just tell her that it's one of those things, no known cause. She says "well didn't you go to your dr and get something for it?" I say yes, and I was on phenergan and Vit B6, but I was still poorly all the way thru, they just stopped me from barfing quite as much. She then says "sounds to me like there was an underlying cause and the hormones of pregnancy kicked it off" I was just about to get really antsy when the health visitor called me over, when I got to her she said "there was one person in front of you but thought I'd get you away from there, you looked like you were going to explode any second" I told her stupid people and stupid comments were not what I needed. She told me that people don't understand unless they have had it, and I should try to be patient with them. HUH

I'm beginning to think I should have dealt with things a little differently... Next time someone says she's big for her age I am just going to say "yes she is isn't she?" and be done with it.... Why oh why do I get myself in these situations!

Thank you, I feel much better now..lol

by **IslandDreamer** » Jul 12, 2005 7:49 am

Don't you love how people play science and look for causes and cures for us? Like we didn't try everything???? Like we asked for it or something????? It's so irritating.

It's hardest to educate the know it alls :roll:

.

Really glad the nice person came to your rescue.

by **Kadinga** » Jul 12, 2005 8:14 am

Helen,

Thank goodness for nurses with a few observation skills! At least she seems to recognise what you've been through and that the emotional side effects don't just disappear when your baby is born. As for Mamma-Know-It-All..... :twisted:

Grrrrrrrrr :twisted:

Wouldn't it be great to be one of those "Charmed" girls and be able to give her a chronic bowel problem right then and there. :wink:

I'm in a card-making frame of mind today, so maybe :idea:

lets all make little cards with the website address on (using the site colours?) and next time some one says "Oh, so you're morning sickness was really bad, huh?' or "So what causes it" or any other similarly stupid or unanswerable query we can just pass them a card and say (Super politely so they feel like they have to listen, like the Mormons when they knock on your door) "It's actually really complicated and I'm only just beginning to understand it myself but there is this very informative website full of information that I've found helped me to cope. It's very serious, can actually be fatal, and its a lot more common that you'd think." and then dive into a very involved goo-goo session with your baby with lots of "Oh but you're worth it sweetums, aren't you, yes you are, you are..."

If I know the average busy-body, they'll either smile politely and leave the card on the bench and never speak to you again (

) or they'd look up the site, read a bit, learn a bit, and start passing the information on to every other woman they ever meet as though they're the most informed person on the planet, which is superficial and irritating but also might get a few people in here who need us........

Keep your chin up, Helen. You are so much stronger than those pathetic, ignorant little....

Amanda

by **rjdecker** » Jul 12, 2005 10:59 am

Helen,

I have been through so many conversations like that. I just give up but it doesn't stop me from being so mad I could slug someone in the nose! Glad that nurse was observant, she is right that people don't understand it unless they have gone through it. Wish we could give all those little know it alls a trip to HG island!

Jenny

by **helen-l-a** » Jul 12, 2005 11:33 am

Stupid and THICK Stupid and THICK Stupid and THICK Stupid and THICK...... perhaps you should take up Jenny's suggestion of carrying a club to hit these people with??

Helenxxx

by **HelenA** » Jul 12, 2005 1:20 pm

Can I use a baseball bat??? I believe they are harder..lol A nice big heavy metal one....lol

Yes the HV was nice, she was the one that finally put it on my notes as a pregnancy problem. Pity it wasn't diagnosed properly (only the hospital said it was HG when I went in for IV) until AFTER I had her....sigh

by **Jolene** » Jul 12, 2005 8:36 pm

It makes you wonder why this lady would even keep questioning you after all of your explainations. How annoying! I have gotten to the point where I smile and nod, and in my head I am saying "blah blah blah....will they ever stop talking...."

Even my husband is at that point. With my last hospital visit, they thought it might have been kidney stones causing the pain. Somehow, it got around his place of work that his wife has kidney stones, and instead of explaining AGAIN about the big unknown causes of all my illnesses, he just nods his head and goes along with it.

I like the idea of little cards to hand out, no words necessary, just take it or leave it.

Jolene

by **helen-l-a** » Jul 13, 2005 4:26 am

There must be a reason.........................

well yes there is actually, it is a test of our character and it's qualities as a patient, rational, non-violent human being, showing our initiative and demonstrating our ability to draw on endless supplies of sympathy for those of a lesser understanding

. ............. Now.. where's my club!?????? :lol: