Thoughts of #2 dancing in my head...
Posted: Jun 01, 2004 12:28 am
Hello all,
My name is Karen, I posted regularly on HuGS while I was pregnant with my daughter, Miya (born June 5, 2003). Her first birthday is on Saturday!
I have FINALLY reached the point where I can come back here and talk about HG, and its impact on my life. For such a long time, the wounds were too fresh and I found myself actually getting sick while reading posts here.
I hope to be of some hope to those who are experiencing their own personal hell right now!
I am also writing because I feel down. I belong to another online group of mothers of babies born in June 2003. Four of these mothers are pregnant again, and its all they can talk about. I am feeling increasingly depressed about it, as I had always planned on having two children and now am not sure I could do it. I guess I should talk about my HG experience a little...
Short version: We started trying for children quite early, because I have endometriosis. It took 6 months to conceive. I was 4 weeks pregnant when I found out, and foolishly thought I'd bypass morning sickness. HG hit with a bang at 6 weeks. Within a month, I lost 20 pounds and became completely bedridden. Rather than the constant vomitting most HG sufferers have, I had totally debilitating nausea, making it impossible to consume ANYTHING. I only left my bed to shower (my husband had to carry me in and out of the tub and wash me) and for OB appts. At 16 weeks my midwife told me it was either steroid treatment or hospital admittal. I opted to try the steroids and after one treatment was able to eat again. I continued to take Zofran (8mg x 4/day) throughout the pregnancy. I gained back 12 pounds and gave birth to a 6 pound 1 oz. baby via c-section (breech presentation) 5 days before my due date.
Recovery was extremely difficult. I was severely malnurished and had also developed gallbladder disease. To this day, adhesion pain is a constant reminder of the emotional and physical ordeal.
SO, although there are many roadblocks, I still yearn to try again. I cannot conceive until my gallbladder has been removed and we find health coverage that will cover pregnancy (we are paying out of pocket for health care). Then, if we choose to do it again, I'll have to deal with HG again, and most likely another c-section. Except this time I'll have a child to take care of. So why am I even considering it??? How can I deal with my deep down resentment for my own friends, who are floating through their second pregnancies without a hitch? How can I talk myself into doing this again considering all the difficulties we will endure?
My name is Karen, I posted regularly on HuGS while I was pregnant with my daughter, Miya (born June 5, 2003). Her first birthday is on Saturday!
I have FINALLY reached the point where I can come back here and talk about HG, and its impact on my life. For such a long time, the wounds were too fresh and I found myself actually getting sick while reading posts here.
I hope to be of some hope to those who are experiencing their own personal hell right now!
I am also writing because I feel down. I belong to another online group of mothers of babies born in June 2003. Four of these mothers are pregnant again, and its all they can talk about. I am feeling increasingly depressed about it, as I had always planned on having two children and now am not sure I could do it. I guess I should talk about my HG experience a little...
Short version: We started trying for children quite early, because I have endometriosis. It took 6 months to conceive. I was 4 weeks pregnant when I found out, and foolishly thought I'd bypass morning sickness. HG hit with a bang at 6 weeks. Within a month, I lost 20 pounds and became completely bedridden. Rather than the constant vomitting most HG sufferers have, I had totally debilitating nausea, making it impossible to consume ANYTHING. I only left my bed to shower (my husband had to carry me in and out of the tub and wash me) and for OB appts. At 16 weeks my midwife told me it was either steroid treatment or hospital admittal. I opted to try the steroids and after one treatment was able to eat again. I continued to take Zofran (8mg x 4/day) throughout the pregnancy. I gained back 12 pounds and gave birth to a 6 pound 1 oz. baby via c-section (breech presentation) 5 days before my due date.
Recovery was extremely difficult. I was severely malnurished and had also developed gallbladder disease. To this day, adhesion pain is a constant reminder of the emotional and physical ordeal.
SO, although there are many roadblocks, I still yearn to try again. I cannot conceive until my gallbladder has been removed and we find health coverage that will cover pregnancy (we are paying out of pocket for health care). Then, if we choose to do it again, I'll have to deal with HG again, and most likely another c-section. Except this time I'll have a child to take care of. So why am I even considering it??? How can I deal with my deep down resentment for my own friends, who are floating through their second pregnancies without a hitch? How can I talk myself into doing this again considering all the difficulties we will endure?