Feeling like I'm at my breaking point!

[Amee]

Where to start?! I am just so friggin sick! Everything the doctor tries does little to no good. Except she put me on in home IV therapy for a few days, just fluids, and zofran. When we got it started it was a lot better. Still nauseous, but no violent wrenching of stomache acids. But my IV keeps failing. It takes my nurse forever to come do anything. I have spent more time waiting for a nurse to come fix or start an IV than actually on it. And I'm really really nervous that the next step will be a picc line. the idea of getting a picc line put in really freaks me out!
I can't even think straight, I feel like crap. Right now I'm getting to the point where I'm depressed (not being able to do anything from take care of my other kids, to washing my hair is just taking a toll on me.) I feel bad, I look horrible, in yesterday's pjs. I have been trying to be tough and get through it, but Nothing is working out. The idea of doing this for 6 more months ( I'm 14 weeks preg now) just makes me cry!!!
How did other woman with HG get through it?

[dawnypie]

Don't be scared of a PICC line. I have one and it has been my life saver. Having the continuous fluid will help you stay hydrated and is the only way zofran will work. I am also 14 weeks and having a rough time with just about everything. I am also in yesterdays pjs and can't get into the shower without my husband helping me and my mom has to wash my hair. I'm debating on whether to cut my hair hair because I can't brush it everyday bur I can't go anywhere to get it cut because I am so ashamed of how I look so I would have to cut it myself. It must be very hard with other children. There are a lot of women on here with multiple children that have very positive messages to share. I do not have other children so I am sorry I am not much help there. Have you tried anything like Benadryl or Unisom? The antihistamines can help with the nausea and make you a little sleepy to offer some relief. Nut when you get a chance I would talk to your doc about a PICC line. You are taught to do everything yourself and you don't have to wait for a nurse to come do everything. I hope that you find some relief soon. One thing I hear a lot on here is remember how far you have come. These are 14 weeks you never have to do again. Even when you don't feel like it, you are incredibly strong. I am always on here and on facebook so if you ever need anything or just want to talk please let me know. Best wishes for a great nights sleep and a better day tomorrow.

[Bronte's mum]

Aw Amee, I really feel for you. I agree with what Dawnypie wrote - 14 weeks you'll never have to do again.

I'm 10 weeks with my second. My first (also a HG pregnancy) is just over a year old.

My first HG pregnancy was such a shock. I'd never heard of HG before, let alone ever been so sick. The end of the first trimester and mid-second trimester were the worst weeks - exactly where you are at.

It did improve over the months, though I still took Zofran. To get through it I did a few things:

Read lots of books and watched movie after movie, or better yet good TV series (didn't take too much brain power to follow!) on my laptop in bed. This allowed me to 'escape' from reality for a few hours and get through the boredom of being bed bound.

My husband used to encourage me to get out of bed on the days that I could to at least walk 20 metres in some fresh air. I hated it, but know it did me good. Some days I just couldn't get out of bed.

Get somone to change your bed sheets each week. It's so easy to let the weeks go by as they feel more and more awful! It's hard and sometimes I just couldn't, but I tried to have a bath or shower every day. I loved baths because I could just lie there!

Get as much help as you possibly can from friends and family with your other children. It's one time in our lives where us HGers really need it. I know I'm lucky to have family nearby (in-laws) and I have just asked my mum to come up and stay (they live 5hrs drive away) for a week or so because I'm dying for her company and just the little things like putting the washing on.

I also tried to look to the future as much as possible. Prior to my pregnancy I was training for a marathon & I was determined to enter a half-marathon after the birth. Primarily it was set as my goal to get fit and healthy again, and my secondary goal was to show people that I am tough - the HG was real, not me being a hypocondriac over normal morning sickness! It was a really emotional run needless to say! Find what drives you when you are not sick from HG and set some sort of positive goal.

This time around I know what the end result is. With my first, we had no idea what becoming a parent was going to be like, and to be honest, if we really wanted to. I used to lie in bed wondering what we'd done. I just have to look at my DD now and she reminds me why I'm going through this hell again!

Try not to be scared of possible future treatment - who knows, a PICC line might really help you?

Stay strong and know that there are other HGers here who are thinking of you![/i]

[Amee]

Thank you for your support. I have tried unisom and benedryl- I usually vomit any oral medication now. But I got childrens melting benedryl, that I tried today, and didn't throw up. The doctor took me off the home IV over the weekend to try suppositories. And if it doesn't work, Monday I get a picc.
I had been really trying to stay positive before today. Telling myself things like "at least the baby seems healthy!" or "at least it's not one of my kids going thru this". And today I just locked myself in my room, and cried. Not that I haven't cried before, but I just can't pull myself together today.
My family is helping alot, in the past week I have gotten so bad they have been doing everything. It's also been hard for me, I just feel so useless.

Did it hurt to have a picc line put in? I have had 5 IVs put in this week, and the last two gave me alot of problems. Did they have a hard time getting your picc line in?

[Hotbrass]

Hey Aimee - So sorry you are so sick! I hear you when you say your at the end of your rope. This is So hard and you just want it to stop. You just want your life back. How old are your kids? Do you have much help with them?

I've done this with a little one that was still nursing and that was really rough. I couldn't do anything for him or give him anything. After the first month of me being so sick with no family close and my husband working an extreme amount, our almost 2 yr old lost 5 lb in 1 month! He was totally stressed out and I couldn't give him the care he needed. (I should have been in the hospital!) I let him continue to try to nurse even though I had no milk because it was the only thing I could offer him as a Mom. We moved back home close to family and even though I was still very ill, it was comforting that he was being cared for.

The next time I had an 8.5 and a 6 who were trying to care for me during the day (take care of themselves and do school) I'll never forget the time when I was finally doing well enough to go out to the living room and I saw my 8.5 pulling out a casserole of the oven and telling his Sister to stay out of the way because it's hot. I was horrified but they had been taking care of everything for months and I guess I was so sick it never crossed my mind as to how they were going about it. They both had to grow up a bit quickly and it made me sad.

This time I have a teen, a tween and a 5. Easier in some ways; self sufficient and take care of me pretty well - Harder in some ways because it makes 3 of us with raging hormones and a little one who is "caught in the crossfire." I don't make a good "Ref" when I can't move. But they do try hard to get all the chores done and do their schooling and care for me. I struggle with feeling guilty because they have so much responsibility put on them and we try to treat each one of them to something special at least once a week.

It's only for a time and we will have our life back! Hugs to you - We will make it together alright!

[dawnypie]

my picc was so easy going in. The lady was like you are going to feel lots of pressure and by the time she said that it was over. They send you for an X ray right after to make sure it is placed right and then you are on your way, depending on your ketones. I had to stay and get some fluids because I was so bad but then they sent me home. I cry every day. Sometimes so much I scare my dogs away. I write a lot on here because it seems to be one of the only things that helps. But sometimes I just have to cry. I already have this morning and it is only 11:15am. I promise that your picc line placement will be over and done with before you know it. Is your doc going to put you on zofran through your picc? I think you said it wasn't working for you before but once you are hydrated it might be worth a shot. Zofran can be a totally different drug once you are hydrated. If you ever need to talk or have any questions please email me and I will be happy to help as much as I can kearney0711@gmail.com let us know how you do tomorrow, you will be fine.

[Amee]

I guess I shouldnt be scared of a picc. My son had a picc put in when he was a week old, and it was a big deal, i just kept thinking of that. I'm in the hospital today. Not sure what Tommarro holds. I'm just takIng it day by day. I already feel better after having fluids. And the medicine for nausea hasn't been great, but better than what I was doing. Im in a labor and delivery room, with a little baby warmer in it- and it has actually reminded me a lot of what is in the future. I am not going to do this forever, and there is a prize at the end! Definately having a better day than yeaterday.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story, and listen to me complain. I'm sorry your in the same boat as me, even though it helps to know I'm not the only person going thru it.